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Help Keep Your Divorce From Hurting Your Kids

Divorce is stressful. It includes guilt, grief and heartache - not to mention anger and blame. Divorcing parents are often so filled with emotions that they forget how this is affecting their kids.

When children are very young, they simply do not have the capacity to grasp what is going on. If their parents choose to vent their emotions in front of the children, or TO the children, the harm can be irrevocable.

Older children understand that the family is breaking up. If you aren't paying close attention to them (and many parents don't when they are buried in their own emotions) it's easy to miss how lost they are feeling. Their world is changing and that creates insecurity.

Now, more than ever, they need you to assure them that this is a part of life and your love for them will never change.

Children understand good and bad, and they will often try to decide which parent is the good parent and which parent is the bad parent. If you do not reassure them and help them understand that they are not to blame, it can leave behind deep scars that may never heal.

No matter what you feel about your ex, your kids should be encouraged to maintain a child/parent relationship. Never try to paint your ex as a villain. - At best, it will backfire and your children will no longer trust your judgment. At worst, it will create an insecure child - with invisible scars - who will grow up never knowing why they fail at relationships.

 

 

 

 

 

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