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Conquer The Despair of Divorce

When a divorce is in the works, many parents will sit around and think about the past while they worry about the future. As we learned in lesson two, our thoughts directly affect our feelings. And, as we learned in lesson five, there are many techniques we can use to reduce stress and fear.

Emotions can weaken us - but they can also give us strength. You can choose which.

If you allow sadness and self pity to move in, you will not be able to move past the pain and it will be a struggle just to get through each day. If you make up your mind to focus on a new, better life, your emotions can propel you further than you thought possible.

It's easy to want to be positive about the divorce, but how can we actually be positive? In the beginning we simply don't believe that we will ever get past this. But, keep focusing on the positive and you will soon see that it becomes easy. And, don't be surprised if you are soon happier than you ever were during your marriage.

Start with taking a few minutes to go for a walk. It doesn't matter where you walk just do it. Pay attention to everything you see. Cars, buildings, people and animals. Notice the sun or the rain. Feel the wind on your face. Hear the crickets chirp or the kids playing ball. Remember all these things.

Now, the next time you catch yourself feeling sad or upset about your divorce, close your eyes and remember the senses you absorbed during your walk. If you want to - or need to - get up and go for a walk again.

If walking isn't for you, find another activity that allows you to think. Basketball could be your sport. Concentrate on making those baskets - and you won't be thinking about your divorce. Teaching your dog to fetch can take your mind off your divorce.

Whatever activity (or activities) you choose, use them whenever you start feeling sad about your divorce. If you can't physically break away to go do the activity immediately, take a few minutes to think about it.

In a week or two, you will automatically think about the activity as soon as bad thoughts of the divorce enter your head. Before long, you won't have those bad thoughts anymore. It is time to move forward. Understand the mistakes that were made and prepare to move forward with your life.

 

 

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